TO get into the Olympic spirit, this week I have been thinking of ways that I too can be an Olympic athlete competing for my country.
Because I spend most of my time on the Tube, finding the time to prepare myself for the Games can be difficult.
That’s why I have come up with my very own Olympic sporting categories that I would like to share with you to bring out your competitive side!
I’m a firm believer that you can do anything you put your heart into, and winning gold for my special ‘Tube Olympic Sports’ is something that my fellow commuters should get the chance to do and represent their respective countries in the following events..
Tube Gymnastics: Using the overhead rails as an apparatus, you can be an all-rounder or show your skills in Artistic Gymnastics and try your best arabesque or cartwheel. This is best to be performed during off peak times! Bonus points for wearing a leotard on the tube!
Tube Judo: If anyone gets too close you or keeps hitting you with their handbag, bust out a Ko Uchi Gari inside reap and be judged on your technique. Bonus points for making ninja style sounds!
Tube Gap Jump: Minding the gap and gaining the most distance onto the Tube. Remembering that the four phases to this event are: the run up, the take-off, the flight through the air and the landing. You will of course be judged on your strength and grace. Bonus points if you ‘stick’ the landing!
Tube Weight Lifting: Try your best competition lifts. Get creative and use your bags, suitcases or even the person standing next to you. You get bonus points if you are lugging an instrument in a large case or a bicycle. Bonus points if you can make the entire journey between two stations holding your chosen item in the air!
Tube Platform Sprint: Makes running to catch your Tube a little bit more fun! Luckily this track and field event caters for all with both long and short distance heats. Bonus points if you can incorporate some hurdles into your sprint!
Tube Armpit Dodge: Dodging the armpits of your fellow commuters as you squirm your way through the carriage. Think of it as a gauntlet but a smellier one. Bonus points for spraying people with deodorant along the way!
Like any of the ‘real’ Olympic events there are rules, and you will most definitely be disqualified for a false start if you do not remember to swipe your Oyster card at the gates.
So get into the Olympic spirit and make your country proud!
NB: These are not official Olympic events and should not be performed without a sense of humour.