ON arrival in London, I wasn’t expecting too much trouble understanding slang. There is a large overlap in Australian and British slang due to Australia’s British heritage and exposure to BBC television programs such as Are You Being Served?, Fawlty Towers, Some Mothers Do ’ave ‘em, Press Gang, Wallace and Grommit and Jamie Oliver’s cooking shows.
Despite this overlap, I still experienced communication breakdowns due to unknown British slang. On arrival in London I was baffled to be greeted by many Londoners with the phrase ‘you alright?’ I’d answer ‘yes, fine thanks’ wondering if I was still looking jetlagged, and getting a slightly odd look from the Londoner I was conversing with. I soon learnt that ‘you alright?’ means ‘hello, how are you?’ and the correct response is not ‘yes, fine thanks’ but to repeat ‘you alright?’ back. Another, more self-explanatory greeting used is a drawn out ‘hi-ya’.
In the UK, the term ‘pants’ can be used as an insult or expletive, where an Aussie might use ‘shit’. For example, ‘the latest plot twist in Eastenders is pants’ or ‘oh pants, my train has been cancelled’. It also refers to underpants, but never to trousers. Referring to trousers as pants is one of the quickest ways to confuse and/or amuse a Brit. A friend was met with an incredulous and somewhat concerned look when enquiring at her local dry cleaner about the cost of having pants dry cleaned. Other terms used as an insult or expletive include ‘shite’, ‘rubbish’ and my personal favourite ‘bollocks’. ‘Bollocks’ is quite versatile as you can also use it to express approval by describing something as ‘the dog’s bollocks’. Other typically British words to express approval include ‘brilliant’, ‘cracking’ and ‘smashing’.
To ‘fancy’ something is to desire it. When applied to a person you might also describe them as ‘fit/well fit/proper fit’ or specific to ladies ‘tidy’ or ‘totty’. You may have cause to use these words when you are ‘on the pull’ – out trying to pick up someone. This may also involve ‘snogging’ (kissing), however snog is also the name of a frozen yoghurt chain with outlets not only in the UK, but also the Middle East and South America, hence their slogan ‘snogging all over the world’.
‘Swotting/to swot-up’ refers to studying, perhaps cramming for an exam. If you decide to pretend you are sick to avoid the exam, you can say you are ‘poorly’ or that you have the ‘lurgy’. Alternately you could just ‘skive off’ or ‘bunk off’ – not go in that day.
You might describe being a little drunk as ‘squiffy’, and really drunk as ‘arseholed’ or ‘bladdered’. Many Australian slang terms for drunk are in use in Britain; pissed, plastered, loaded, shitfaced, and sloshed, but you might want to steer clear from using ‘maggoted’.
There is of course rhyming slang, ‘dead horse’ for sauce, ‘have a butchers’ for have a look (butchers hook), ‘porkies’/’pork pies’ for lies. Guy Ritchie films give the impression that rhyming slang is in common use all the time, much in the same way that Home and Away gives the impression that all Australians use the terms ‘G’day’ and ‘strewth’; both are true for a small proportion of the population, but not for the majority.
If a meeting is conducted under ‘Chatnam House Rules’, you can use the information received, but not reveal your source. Unfortunately I can’t tell you where I came across this term, but I can wish you ’the best of British’ (good luck) in slinging the odd bit of slang into your conversations.
