Aussie Rules gets wet and wild

By Will Denton
AND on the seventh day, God finally got to watch a proper game of Aussie Rules. His expectations were high after lending a hand (literally) to Jarryd Blair of Collingwood, and help him ‘kick’ the last goal of the match to steal the ANZAC clash and force James Hird to politely slam the door a bit harder in the change rooms. It was another classic but unfortunately for The AFL Rubdown most of the other games were played with massive flooding or in a massive flood.

The Carlton/Freo game was built up by the usual Bruce propaganda but the Blues were as clinical as a German micro surgeon and cut up the Dockers for most of the game. But in true Freo fashion, after doing a pretty damn fine impersonation of a tropical crab migration, they started to play footy for the last 10 minutes of the game only to go down by 8 points. Note to Fremantle FC – big sticks = goals.

Geelong and the Lions played a game at the Gabba, which can only be described as ‘Blind, Slip‘n’Slide Underwater Ball Sport’. Apparently it’s really big in Ukraine. The other wet game was at the MCG and the Saints prevailed over a Melbourne team that people are just starting to feel sorry for now. Hopefully star Dees recruit Mitch Clark will recover from his suicide attempt last week and play against the Cats.

Giants lost again, so did the Suns, no surprises there. However come Sunday, Hawthorn were expected to take care of the Swans down in Tassie, but it seems that the Hawkers got ahead of themselves yet again and were steam rolled by an impressive Sydney outfit led beautifully by 300 gamer Adam Goodes. They are one of two teams currently without loss.

The other being the Eagles after they fought out a fast and furious encounter with the Tigers, and had it not been for a Jack Riewoldt brain explosion, Richmond would’ve won the game of the year so far. Adelaide showdown XXXII closed off the round and it’s the Crows fans who will be enjoying the taste of free beer this week. Amen.

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